What Being A Dom Is About - A Submissive’s Perspective

So, I have done quite a bit of reading, researching, and tumbling and I don’t see a lot of pieces written about what being a Dominant is about from a submissive’s perspective. The topic has weighed pretty heavily on my mind for some time now, and so I decided I would write my own piece. None of this is state fact and it is all very arguably opinion. This is a collection of things that I see, read, and hear over time. from little's/submissive's/princess's/pet's, therefore some of these things might not be so important to one version of a Top as it would be another (Daddy vs. Dom). 

1. Being a Dom is about knowing when to be selfish and selfless

2. Being a Dom is about being a keeper of promise and of peace

3. Being a Dom is about being able to know when to be calculated and when to be spontaneous

4. Being a Dom is about being a leader but knowing when to follow

5. Being a Dom is about being educated and educating

6. Being a Dom is about self gratification and self sacrifice

7. Being a Dom is about being stern and being loving

8. Being a Dom is about standing your ground while holding someone else’s footing

9. Being a Dom is about being responsible and relatable

10. Being a Dom is about being reasonable and rational

11. Being a Dom is about knowing how and when to control

12. Being a Dom is about knowing how and when to lose control

13. Being a Dom is about being tender but strong

14. Being a Dom is about knowing the difference between strength and arrogance

15. Being a Dom is about knowing how to control yourself before you try to control others

16. Being a Dom is about knowing how to be a gentleman and a lover

17. Being a Dom is about knowing how to be a friend and an authority figure

18. Being a Dom is about knowing how to love yourself so you can love another

19. Being a Dom is about always putting safety first

20. Being a Dom is about learning more about yourself while exploring another

21. Being a Dom is about being actively involved in your own evolution and the evolution of your submissive

22. Being a Dom is about remember that your submissive is a human too

23. Being a Dom is about being a safe haven with the excitement and attraction of danger

24. Being a Dom is about being multifaceted and multifunctional

25. Being a Dom is about knowing which boundaries to respect and which to lightly step over

26. Being a Dom is about being a communicator and an initiator

27. Being a Dom is about being flexible and rigid

28. Being a Dom is about knowing when to make rules and when to break them

29. Being a Dom is about being an example

30. Being a Dom is about seeing most of the possibilities, not just one

31. Being a Dom is about understanding more than one side

32. Being a Dom is about having power but not abusing it

33. Being a Dom is about being a protect who knows when to ask for help

34. Being a Dom is accepting failure as a learning opportunity, not a brick wall

35. Being a Dom is about finding routine, but being creative

36. Being a Dom is about being a teacher and a student

37. Being a Dom is about patience and execution

38. Being a Dom is about knowing when to speak and when not to

39. Being a Dom is about understanding and recognizing a submissive’s struggles

40. Being a Dom is about understanding and recognizing a Dom’s struggles

41. Being a Dom is about trusting yourself and trusting your submissive

42. Being a Dom is about being independent, but knowing when and how to depend on others

43. Being a Dom is about treating submissives with the respect that a Dom requires

44. Being a Dom is about appreciating differences, but being willing to work with them instead of around or against them

45. Being a Dom is about compromise

46. Being a Dom is about being forgiving

47. Being a Dom is about problem solving

48. Being a Dom is about feeling, thinking, and then doing

49. Being a Dom is about balance

50. But most of all being a Dom is about being a human, recognizing it, and acting as such